In the beginning was the Word… and the Word was not of this world…

Thoughts of he, and she, and me,

While your arms were outstretched so lovingly,

Hoping that one-day I would be

All that you predestined me to be….

They hung Him high, and they strung Him wide

The ridiculed, beat, and pierced his side

In hopes that in His word I would abide

The Father sent Him down,

The King of Kings – yet he wears no crown

Hope floats like walking on water, yet He did not drown…

Sin and backsliding, round and round,

When will it end?

When my Destiny is found.

Lord, why do you love me

Lord why do you forgive me

When all I do if fail thee

The bitter sweet aroma of sins

That I have committed much to your chagrin

Cause my very soul to dwindle and thin

Take me back, take me back

I promise I will never do it again

Just to be laid up beside him –

Yet again

While He was on the Cross, I was on His mind

Yes, he even loved my sinning behind

Day to day, time after time,

A space and place to commune with him I cannot find

Yet he hears my cry

He answers my call

When I know It is He whom I ignore

All that the enemy has stolen I shall regain

All pain is not lost, because through it all

I am still….somewhat Sane…

Who am I to complain?

Knowing that I have always been on the Master’s brain

People and times seem to stay the same

Blind ambition chasing fortune and fame

But when this here earth finally passes away

What are you going to do with all that you think your about to gain?

I want my Spirit to live

I want my soul to thrive

I want to be the Apple of My Fathers Eye

He covers me as the days pass us by

Watching and waiting for me to drop the disguise

All the while mine enemies plotting my demise

Falling onto my knees, my soul finally cries

Yes, Lord!

I can’t take it

Yet I refuse to fake it

I desire to make it

To be all that you pre destined me to be

I know I have sinned, I know I have been wrong

I know I keeping singing that same sad song

But I am tired of the lies

And the falling of man, where my hope resides

I want you to build me up, strong, virtuous and true

To be a living Epistle to you, and only you

To declare your goodness, and to show your good works

But why would you choose me?

Ah but of course, of course

I too am the stone that the builder refused

The one everyone thought you couldn’t use

Because of my past pain and fear of being abused

But now, I happily accept their ridicule

The world hated You, so it must definitely hate me

You bring about dreams and visions of what is about to be

What I have done is done, and shall forever remain in history

While I grow more and more interested in His story

But no matter what I do or where I go, ensuring You receive all the Glory

Some are amazed at my daze filled praise,

prancing, singing shouting, and my arms do I raise,

 in my Father’s eyes I long to gaze,

while he navigates me through life’s maze

He knew I would fall short

He knew His words I would try to distort

All to make of myself a good report

Please forgive me, for when I stand in your Heavenly court

I never want it to be said, your gift did I abort

This life that grows in me

This ministry that fuels me

This calling that drives me

All aiming to see

Your truly glory